My sister nailed it. I called her late yesterday afternoon and complained that it had been a sad day. I listed out all the whiny, annoying, tear-inducing-for-no-reason things that had happened throughout the day. Including:
I had a bad dream and a muscle spasm that resulted in a sore knee.
I didn’t want to do my rehab.
I took several comments from Ace personally.
I lost an athlete.
I can’t even leave the porch by myself!
I had to clean up this, that and those all by myself!
I haven’t taken a shower in a week!
Blah. Blah. Blah.
She reminded me that I had compared surgery day to an IRONMAN event and that all this was was POST IRONMAN BLUES! I forgot about those! I forgot that there’s often a let-down after a big event. Sometimes it is immediate and sometime it’s delayed.
The post IRONMAN blues are a well-documented phenomenon. Athletes in training spend every waking moment thinking about their race; training, planning, worrying, drawing up various scenarios in their head, and spending most of their disposable income on products that promise a faster time. This is completely natural and I’d be concerned if an athlete didn’t give much thought to their race. However, after we cross the finish line and the elation has subsided, many people end up with a large M-dot shaped hole in their life.
This is often inevitable, but affects different people in different ways. Some people feel a bit empty for a few weeks, others feel destitute, comparing everything they do to the completion of their race. The latter often find it harder to enjoy the simple things in life. LIFE AFTER IRONMAN
I guess the same can be said for this surgery. I spent every waking moment thinking about pre-hab, worrying about outcomes and drawing up various scenarios in my head. The fear leading into it and the elation of a successful surgery have subsided. Now, I’m faced with literally three holes in my knee.
The article referenced above says to reconnect with friends you neglected during training, finish a project that you didn’t have time for during training and set your sights on another event. I did that. I reconnected with one of my newest athletes about her recent race. And, I started working on TRI ECHO - which is both a neglected project AND an upcoming event. I also asked for help getting to and from rehab on Wednesday. I washed my hair in the sink and I watched a campy-funny-silly movie.
I know that this is all part of the journey and I’m looking forward to what’s next.
